Dear Urban Diplomat,
After my father died earlier this year, I was so upset that I couldn’t bear the thought of speaking at his funeral, so I asked my cousin to deliver the eulogy instead. At the time, I thought his words felt a bit impersonal, but he did the job. Last week, over beers, he let slip that he’d been busy hauling the kids from one camp to the next, so he’d used AI to write the speech. Am I wrong to be livid?
—At a Loss, Norseman Heights
AI has infiltrated just about every part of life with its ruthless, impersonal efficiency, but there are some places where it simply shouldn’t go—a funeral being one of them. That said, not everyone is a writer, and most people crumble at the prospect of public speaking. My advice: keep your outrage in proportion to the bot’s contribution. If your cousin entered authentic, heartfelt prompts and the machine simply tied them together in a coherent way, the violation feels less egregious. But, if he wrote, “Write me a eulogy about an uncle,” you’re right to be mad. Suss out the facts over your next round of pints and plan your confrontation accordingly.
Dear Urban Diplomat,
I was recently at a new pay-what-you-can farmers’ market with my lawyer friend. She makes six figures, but when it came time to fill the donation jar, she paid maybe 10 bucks in loonies and toonies for an armful of fresh produce. Then she began rationalizing, saying that she can no longer afford to pay full freight because she overpaid for her condo last year. I get that PWYC is subjective, but the concept is designed to help the impoverished, not the house poor. Right?
—Selling the Farm, Cabbagetown
Would she stiff her server on their tip because she overspent on wine? Something tells me absolutely not. PWYC is a fine idea, but it’s not meant for folks in the upper tax brackets. Show sympathy for a friend who’s been victimized by Toronto’s broken housing market, but find a way to simultaneously remind her that saving 40 cents on a zucchini won’t do much other than rack up debt with the karma bank.
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Dear Urban Diplomat,
My son and I have been diehard Raptors fans since they won the championship, and we try to attend as many games as we can. We have a ritual of grabbing burgers and shakes beforehand. All this time, my wife has never shown the slightest interest in joining us, but suddenly she’s asking to tag along. The problem is that I like the dynamic my son and I have, and a third wheel would change that. How do I say no without setting her off?
—Strife Partner, Cedarvale
Excluding one’s spouse from family time is a high-wire act that I ardently discourage. Instead, try to look at it from a different angle: Is she yearning for two hours in an arena or for some bonding time herself? I suspect it’s the latter, so try to arrange multiple ways for you all to connect as a trio. Bring her along for a game, but also go ahead and set up some alternative outings. You may find that your Raptors tradition remains unchanged in the long run.
Dear Urban Diplomat,
My dog-loving friend dotes on her Pomeranian. She’s forever taking it to the doggie beauty parlour and getting its fur trimmed into ridiculous shapes. Sometimes the poor creature emerges with its nails painted or with part of its fur dyed a crazy shade. Now she’s heard about these designer perfumes for pooches and has started spritzing the thing day and night. It’s too much. Should I say something even though I know she won’t want to hear it?
—Fashion Police, Liberty Village
Try to get over it. Ultimately, it’s your friend’s dog and your friend’s life. What’s it to you? Doting on a canine brings people joy, so why get in the way? One caveat that may necessitate intervention: dogs smell the way that humans see, and pet perfumes are often created with input from veterinarians to achieve gentle scents. If your friend is dousing Fido with fragrances for people, it’s akin to firing an aroma bazooka into the dog’s highly sensitive nose.
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{URL}https://torontolife.com/city/dear-urban-diplomat-my-cousin-used-ai-to-write-my-fathers-eulogy/{/URL}
{Author}Toronto Life{/Author}
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{Keywords}City,AI,dogs,farmers’ market,Raptors,Urban Diplomat{/Keywords}
{Source}Applications{/Source}
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